Pride vs Humility

It's a show down. Pride in the left corner with his coach Satan. Humility in the opposite corner with his coach Christ. Who will win!?! In a world becoming increasingly focused on self and self fulfillment, pride seems to be taking the lead. In his book,"Drawing Heaven Into Your Marriage,"  Dr. Goddard quoted Roy Baumeiste, "Many Americans today can no longer accept the idea that love requires sacrificing oneself or making oneself unhappy or doing things that do not (at least eventually) serve one's individual best interests. If a relationship does not bring pleasure, insight, satisfaction, and fulfillment to the self, then it is regarded as wrong, and the individual is justified, perhaps even obligated-to end the relationship and find a new, more fulfilling one. According to today's values, "A kind of selfishness is essential to love." 

We are warned that in the last days the "love of men will wax cold" (D&C 45:27). The more we focus on self, the more we open ourselves up to pride slipping in. President Benson gave a talk entitled, "Beware of Pride." He said, "Pride adversely affects all our relationships-our relationship with God and His servants, between husband and wife, parent and child, employer and employee, teacher and student, and all mankind. Our degree of pride determines how we treat our God and our brothers and sisters. Christ wants to lift us to where He is. Do we desire to do the same for others?" It is pride that leads us to find fault with others. In a marriage it is being critical of our spouses weaknesses. We begin to focus on what everyone else is doing wrong rather than looking inward and asking, "Lord is it I" (Matthew 26:22)?

Is there a gage or warning signs to help us prevent pride slipping into our relationships and marriage? The good news is there is!  Dr. Goddard said, "In fact, any time we feel irritated with our spouses, that irritation is not an invitation to call our spouses to repentance but an invitation to call ourselves to repent. We are irritated because of our own lack of faith and humility." President Benson said, "The antidote for Pride is humility-meekness, submissiveness. It is a broken heart and a contrite spirit." We push the natural man aside when we look inward and focus on our own repentance and when we refuse to take offense or find fault. There was a time where I feel irritated with my spouse when he didn't do things the way I thought he should. I was too prideful to admit to myself that I was struggling with the demands of motherhood and post partum depression. So I took my irritation out on my husband. When I think back on this time, I can see how I was not willing to look at myself and see what was really going on. My spouse wasn't doing anything different than he had done for the past 15 years of our marriage, but I was feeling different. Thankfully my spouse took the problem to the Lord to know how to handle it. He was told to serve me more. It eased my burden and I was able to come out of my negative way of thinking. My pride caused the problem, but his humility and desire to seek the Lord's help, changed the situation. 

Next time you feel irritated with the actions of others, follow Dr. Goddard's words that "love is not a happy accident, but a choice." Choose to repent and use those irritations to repent and humble yourself. Choose happiness and humility.